Way to Make Your Life More Exciting

love you babe. i hope your day is a little brother. don't forget, we're going to get diablo !!! to night! 

that should excite you. i maybe me doing something naughty might excite you more? hmmm? (sexy wink)

you're going to dress up like a demon  and let me hit you with a hammer?

haha! but of course!

  

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A Very Simple Way To Break Up With Ur Boyfriend

it's 11:11! make a wish!

okay:d what'd you wish for?

for you and me to grow up and get married  and stay together forever! 

what'd you wish for?

to find a way  to break up with you before it got to serious?

....are you serious?

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Im Still Gonna Break Up With You

baby, please don't do this. you have no idea how important  you are to me..

i gave you way too many chances. i'm done.

i'll do anything..

forget it, alright? we're octagon.

lolol i meant over. that was funny but i'm still breaking up with you

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Ex-GirlFriend Gets The WIN

well we can still be friend.

promise ?

pinky(:

okay (: can i ask you for a favor

anything (:

go shove that pinky promise up your ass. you broke my heart asshole.

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Awesome Kid Trolling His Mom! Xd

mo can you lend me 30 bucks?!?!?

no! do you think money grows on trees?

what is money made for?

paper

where does paper come from?

...

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I Have A Boyfriend

Hey your really hot wanna go out?

I have a boyfriend

And I have a math test tomorrow 

Wha!! does that have to do with anything

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Handled Like a BOSS!!

what would you do if a broke up with you? 

get back with my ex(:

now i see how much you care, im done-.-

hey you wanna go out?

go with your ex

you are my ex(:

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Dry S*x

Cant wait for Dry S*x

??

WTf ??

Wow .. Dues ex..

wow

Lol

Fail

Thats gold ..??

auto correct ftw .. =D

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Checking Upon Her Boyfriend

cheated  on you 

you what?

wtf!! well that's fine cause i cheated on you with your sister!!

omg checking up! i was checking up on you, you fucking asshole

it's over

baby wait what?

i love you?!?!

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His Parents Should Be Proud Of Him

why arent you in bed yet?! naughty girl... lol

i'm fucking to eminem

wow!!! epic fail auto correct i meant listening to eminem hahaha

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Your Boyfriend Is Terrible In Bed

your boyfriend is terrible in bed.

yeah, i know. yours is much better.

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Sexually Active Mom

hey i've bought the condoms, and a bra i think you will ,like

oh, sweet mom..

GRRR, you can call me momma all night .

omg, sweet jesus , fuck me....

oh i will

HOLLY SHIT !! YOU DIDNT SEE THIS BRIAN, DELETE THIS NOW.

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My life favorite text

had a fight with a gang of squirrels 

jesus christ

remember that scene in the matrix where neo fights loads of smitha?

yeah

it was nothing like that 

they totally beat the crap out of me

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Best Insult Ever

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Cheater Girlfriend

hey babe 

who is this? soory, i lost all my contacts

your boyfriend <3

jake,<3 

kwvin.....

shit

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Hangout Tonight?

Add caption

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Lets make babies tonight

i think we should make babies tonight.

god damn it mer , we talked about this. i'm 23. i'm not ready for kids yet.

we'll talk about this later. i'm not happy with you pressuring me about this shit when i'm at work.

babe i'm sorry i wrote fajitas. i donno what happened.

over react much?

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We are Just Friends Man Nothing More

hwy nick, how long does penis have to be?

the what?!

thesis ** i meant thesis damn autocorrect.

lol,i,m literally laughing my ass off. this is going on facebook.

noo pleasee don't!

fuuuuuu

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Making me so horny

i'm eating pizza right now.

omg stop, you're making me horny!

...that's  so kinky it's hoot.

hungry! you are making you hungry',]

dude, i'm your cousin!

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Your Dad Gets Angry Quick

hey dad. i just got a girlfriend and shes pregnent =)

whats the matter with you. are you proud?!?! when you get home your in so much fucking trouble

your mother already knows and shes devastated. whos this slut you idiot 

dad!!!! i meant perfect ....not pregnant im so sorry. its this damn phone. auto corrected me 

oh..... oh god....you just made me piss my pants....... son.. i broke your laptop...

-_-

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